Soulless Jerk Flower
by DavyDrake
Summary: He could feel all their hearts beating as one. After his brief experience as Asriel again, Flowey has somewhat remembered what it's like to have a soul. He still has trouble with being a jerkwad, but the other monsters and Frisk are there to keep him in check. Post-Pacifist Flowey stuff with very little overarching plot. Cover image doesn't belong to me.
1. 1 Emotional Support Flower

_A/N Before I start, Frisk is a girl in this because I felt like it, sorry if I goof up and use genderless pronouns just because I'm used to it. Rated K+ because I don't really have a reason to make it anything else. Mostly humor and friendship stuff (that sounded so corny XD), maybe one or two sad-ish ones. Enjoy!_

"Howdy! I'm Flowey, Flowey the flower! My interests include killing, teaching kids to swear, and stealing souls!" Flowey said cheerfully from Frisk's shoulder as Frisk's principal's face contorted into an expression of horror.

"Flowey!" Frisk hissed. "You're supposed to make a good impression!"

"What?" Flowey said innocently. "I'm just being honest. Remember all those lovely words I taught you yesterday?"

"He's not always like this," Frisk assured her principle. He didn't look certain.

Flowey was only here because Toriel had been concerned about Frisk going to an all-human school (Toriel was working on a school for both humans and monsters, but the school had a lot of work to go) after all her time with monsters. Also, Frisk had once been an orphan in a vaguely abusive foster family, so she had become rather attached to her monster family and often became very stressed out without them. She just wasn't used to humans again yet. So, Toriel had proposed Frisk take a small monster to school with her every day until she got readjusted. Flowey seemed like he could do the job pretty well.

"And besides, Asriel," Toriel had said with a wink. "You never completed your education."

Flowey had taken a lot more persuasion, but in the end, he went with Frisk. First, however, before he could be of any use, Flowey had to be approved by Frisk's principal. He had to show that he wouldn't be a disturbance.

"He's not actually capable of injuring anyone, right?" the principal asked.

"Wanna find out?" Flowey said with a sneer, but Frisk talked over him.

"He is, but he wouldn't. I promise. Flowey promises too. Right?" She looked up at him with puppy dog eyes. Flowey… hmm, _felt_ wasn't the word for it… knew he _should_ feel… something akin to pity.

"Fine, yes, I promise." He rolled his eyes.

"Well, um," the principle muttered, shuffling through some papers on his desk. Flowey got the idea that he was a little soft spoken for a principal. "I'm sorry Frisk. I haven't got anything against monsters, but… This one seems a little… risky…"

"He won't be a disturbance, I promise!" Frisk said, pleading. "I can get him to be good, really. He's good on his own, deep down."

"Very deep down," Flowey said under his breath. There was something he was probably supposed to say here, but he didn't want to. "I can be good. For Frisk."

The principal seemed to consider silently for a long time. "Alright," he said at last. "We'll try this out for a week, just to see if Flowey can stick to his word. We'll go with a three strikes policy. Flowey, if you can go one week without getting three strikes, you can stay with Frisk at school."

"Yay!" Frisk exclaimed, then ran around the desk to give the principal a hug, nearly flinging Flowey to the floor in the process, which he definitely wasn't appreciative of. "This'll go great, I promise!" Then, Frisk ran out of the room without another word.

…

Papyrus was the only one in Frisk's circle of monster friends who had a driver's license already. He was surprisingly good at driving for never having done it in the underground. It was a little scary to be in the car with him, as although he'd gotten a license, he'd only just barely done so, and his knowledge of traffic laws was a little fuzzy. However, he dropped Frisk off for school every day and picked her up too, often accompanied by Sans.

"heya kid. how'd it go?" Sans asked when Frisk climbed into Papyrus's super rad convertible.

"Great!" Frisk exclaimed.

"Yeah, real swell," Flowey grumbled.

"WOWIE! THAT'S AWESOME," Papyrus said, almost running a red light as he turned to look at Frisk. "WAIT, WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT?"

"tori wants the evil satan flower to go to school with frisk," Sans explained. "to keep her company. i guess you could say their _budding_ relationship is coming in handy."

"PLEASE NEVER USE THAT JOKE AGAIN." Papyrus actually _did_ run a red light this time, but Flowey seemed to be the only one who noticed as Frisk and Sans were too busy laughing at that horrible flower puns. That was one of the worst things about Smiley Trashbag. The flower puns. Did he think Flowey _wanted_ to be a flower? Flowey knew he was just salty because of past timelines, but now they were finally out of the underground forever, no resets. Flowey hadn't murdered anyone in months. Couldn't they put things behind them?

"sorry pap. i can _seed_ you're very angry about that."

"I WILL PULL THIS CAR OVER AND THROW YOU OUT."

"come on, i'm just _pollen_ your leg." The laughter was unbearable. Flowey would have cut his own ears off if he had ears or could hold a knife.

"SANS!"

"okay okay, i'll stop, seriously," Sans said, chuckling and wiping an eye socket. He didn't sound sincere.

"Finally," Flowey grumbled.

"i sincerely a _flower_ gize."

Sans was abandoned on the sidewalk and that was the end of that. He seemed to have no regrets.


	2. 2 Strike One

Frisk woke up too early that morning, which meant Flowey did too. "Flowey!" a little voice said, jerking out of his sleep. "Flowey! Flowey! Floweyfloweyfloweyflowey--"

"I'm awake!" Flowey shrieked, letting his face go slightly murderous. Frisk immediately took a step back. Bet that stirs up some memories, huh, twerp? Flowey should've felt bad about that, scaring Frisk even though she was the only one who would've spared him. But at the same time, he was a little bit upset about being spared. Sometimes… sometimes, he wish Frisk would've just stomped him and ended his existence. Stomped him and released him from being a flower. Stomped him and released him from everything really…

But that was just morbid thinking he found himself falling into sometimes. If he was going to think morbid on purpose, it was usually about the violent deaths of his many enemies, and those were good morbid thoughts.

Flowey tried to shake it off and smile. "Oh, golly! Got a little harsh there, didn't I."

Frisk hesitated a moment, then made her own face smile. "Aren't you excited!? You get to come to school with me today! It's gonna be so much fun showing you around and--"

"Frisk, don't get too excited. I'm just gonna sit on your shoulder all day and things will continue as usual. Nothing monumental is going on here."

"Aw, you're such a grumpy grumps," Frisk said with a fake pout. "Come on, Mom probably has breakfast ready!" She said that as though Flowey had a choice about going to breakfast. She seemed to forget that Flowey was stuck in a pot.

Flowey tried not to freak out as Frisk picked him up and raced down the hall with him. He swore one of these days, she was gonna drop him, and then… Well, bad things would go down.

"Good morning, my children," Toriel said brightly, flipping over some pancakes as the two of them entered the kitchen. It was a small room, but it was lit warmly and the colors were soft and inviting. It was probably Flowey's favorite room in the surface house, though he hated to admit he liked any of the rooms, or anything in general.

"Morning Mom!" Frisk said brightly. She then paused and stared at Flowey, smiling expectantly.

"What?" Flowey asked tersely.

"Come on, you know." She nudged one of Flowey's leaves with her finger.

Flowey let out a long sigh that could shake the earth. "Good morning, woman who birthed me."

"Good enough for me, Asriel," Toriel said, smiling and returning her attention to the pancakes.

This was shaping up to be a very bad morning.

Asriel Asriel Asriel. Flowey regretted that Frisk had EVER convinced him to tell Toriel the truth--well, most of it anyways--of his origins. Couldn't she understand that wasn't who he was anymore? Toriel may be his mother--as he'd just shown, he understood and accepted that as well as anyone else--and she may have convinced herself that he was still the child she loved, but he could never really be her son again. He wasn't Asriel. He wasn't a fluffy innocent kid anymore and he never could be again. He'd let go of that when he released the SOULs, and he would forever be torn between regretting and knowing he should be proud of that decision.

"That's not my name anymore!" Flowey snapped. Toriel froze. Frisk looked up with an 'oh this just got real' expression on her face.

Silence hung heavy for a moment. Nobody moved a muscle until the smell of lightly burnt pancakes began to waft from the stove and Toriel hurriedly scraped the remaining pancakes onto a separate plate. Then, and Flowey wasn't sure what to expect on her face, Toriel turned to face the two of them.

And she smiled.

"It still is," she said. "I think more so than you realize."

Flowey had no idea what that was supposed to mean. He studied the wood grain of the table, considering what to say. A simple, weary "Whatever," escaped his mouth, and he considered that good enough.

"No Sans?" Frisk asked as she climbed into Papyrus's car.

"UNFORTUNATELY NO. MY BROTHER DID NOT GET UP EARLY ENOUGH TODAY. THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HOWEVER, IS NEVER LATE."

"Good riddance," Flowey muttered, once again riding on Frisk's shoulder.

"Flowey!" Frisk exclaimed, setting him down on the seat next to her and flicking one of his petals.

How rude! "Did you just FLICK me?" he growled, making a hissing noise. "You're gonna PAY for that!"

"PLEASE, NO BULLETS IN THE VEHICLE."

"Can it, Skeletor," Flowey hissed, not even quite sure where he'd heard of that character. He summed a circle of small white bullets behind himself. Serious maiming was about to go down.

"I'M NOT SURE WHETHER OR NOT I SHOULD BE OFFENDED BY THAT."

"Flowey, you've been nothing but mean today," Frisk said, kind of whining. Ughhhh Flowey hated it when she did that. "What's up with you?"

"Me? Mean? Never." Sarcasm dripped from his voice venomously.

"You made that face at me this morning," Frisk said, and Flowey sensed a list/lecture coming.

"I make lots of faces. I'm remarkably expressive for a flower."

"You made Toriel upset."

"She knows I HATE that name!"

"And what's this about Sans? Why do you have such a problem with him? Is it the puns?"

"Oh it's SO much more than the puns you wouldn't even believe it," Flowey said, voice rising to a shrill shout.

"PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS IS MY BROTHER YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT AND AS THE DRIVER, THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS EVERY RIGHT TO PULL THIS CAR OVER."

"What did I JUST SAY, IDIOT?"

"Hey!"

Flowey had just about reached his limit. He was about to do it. He was about to let loose those bullets he was maintaining. He wouldn't kill her or anything, just whittle her HP down a little, just enough to make it hurt for a while and remind her why she shouldn't mess with him.

"WELL WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, WE'RE AT THE SCHOOL," Papyrus said hurriedly and nervously, evidently very much in a hurry to get the two of them out of his super rad convertible. "YOU TO HAD BETTER GO. HAVE A GOOD DAY, HUMAN AND SMALL FLOWER FRIEND."

Frisk scooped Flowey off of the seat, the two of them still fuming, and stormed off towards the building. Papyrus drove away a little faster than usual. Flowey was suddenly very aware of the actual threat he had just posed to Frisk, the one who vouched to spare him. And he hated it. He remembered a time he could've done that without caring. He missed those days.

Flowey was bored out of his ever hating mind. Frisk was in fifth grade. Flowey had to sit through FIFTH GRADE CLASSES and it was SO ANNOYING he was going to SERIOUSLY WILT AND DIE. "How do you put up with this crap?" Flowey asked as the kids were dismissed for lunch.

"It's not that bad," Frisk assured him. "It's kinda fun!" She'd already forgiven him. Curse her kind little determined SOUL.

They passed a kid who gave them a funny look. And he didn't look just at Flowey. He looked right into Frisk's face with those judgemental eyes and Flowey glared right back with his most menacing, most threatening stare. "Unless you want to surrender your SOUL to me, you better get your little legs moving, twerp."

Flowey had never seen a human move that fast. He was down the hall before Flowey could blink.

"You can't say stuff like that to people! You promised!" Frisk protested.

"Why the h--" He stopped himself. Elementary school. He was in an elementary school. However minor the swear, here it was a crime. "--heck do you let them look at you like that?"

Frisk shrugged and thought for a moment, then seemed to realize she was blocking the flow of little kids down the hallway and got back to walking. "I dunno. I guess since all that happened in the Underground, a few little stares don't seem as important."

"Hmpf," Flowey snorted. "Well, they better not do it again."

"Flowey…" Frisk said, and it was a warning. "Much as I appreciate you trying to protect me, I don't need it, really. And they won't let me keep you here if you're too mean, so you gotta stop doing that."

"Not promising that."

"Oh, come on. You already did, remember? You said you wouldn't be a disturbance."

"I'll try my best," Flowey said, wrinkling where his nose would've been if he had one and letting a note of sarcasm creep into his voice.

Frisk sat down, having arrived at a table. She didn't have many friends. Flowey remembered her telling Toriel that one night. However, the human did have a couple human friends. Cassandra, or Cassy, and Ryan. Their names were written on Flowey's brain. He remembered those names not only because Frisk rambled on about them non stop, but also because he'd made a personal vow to slaughter them if they ever harmed Frisk.

"Hey, how's it--" Cassy broke off, evidently having noticed Flowey. She was a small girl with tanned skin, probably of Hispanic background, with curled brown hair and a splash of freckles across her nose. "Oh wow, is that a monster?"

"Yeah!" Frisk said excitedly. "Flowey, this is Cassy. Flowey, say hi!"

"Howdy," Flowey muttered aloofly.

"Don't mind him. He acts super mean, but he's sweet on the inside, I promise!"

Flowey smiled somewhat sinisterly. "Hey kid, can I see your soul for a sec?"

"Flowey, we talked about this." Frisk frowned. "Say no," she urged Cassy.

"Ummmm," Cassy said. "No, then?" She giggled a bit nervously. "It's cool to finally see a monster in person though! I mean, I've seen them on TV of course, and you told me about them, but I mean, none live in my area, so… Anyways yeah, nice to meet you, Flowey!"

"Uh, yeah," Flowey muttered.

"Ryan not here today?" Frisk asked.

"Nah, he caught a cold. And I'm kind of glad he's not here. He has allergies." Cassy said that last bit while pointing to Flowey.

"Excuse you, but I don't even pollinate."

Cassy's eyebrows shot up. "Whoops, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you. No need to get crazy. That would be ex _seed_ ingly bad."

No.

NO.

ABSOLUTELY NOT.

He put up with this from Sans because he didn't want to upset Frisk, but there was another reason: in this form, fighting Sans would be a ridiculously stupid idea. One day, Flowey would get his hands on a human SOUL, and he would once again take the name Asriel Dreemurr, and the first thing he'd do, yes, the absolute FIRST THING, would be to slowly obliterate everyone Sans loved, making terrible puns the entire time just to see how HE liked it, and then obliterate him too, in the most violent way he could think of. He'd find some way to placate Frisk.

However, there was no way in this reality or any other that he was going to put up with this from a little girl.

"TAKE IT BACK," Flowey screeched, his face contorting into the most demonic expression he could muster.

"Flowey no!" Frisk hollered, taking him off her shoulder and holding him tightly a small distance away while he writhed and struggled. He didn't want to use bullets. He wanted to BITE INTO SOMEONE'S FLESH AND DRINK THEIR BLOOD OR SOMETHING VIOLENT LIKE THAT. "We talked about this! We TALKED ABOUT THIS!"

"I CAN'T STAND THESE TERRIBLE PUNS ANYMORE. I'M GOING TO KILL SOMEONE."

"What's going on over here?"

Whichever teacher was on duty to watch the kids at lunch--Flowey had never bothered to learn any of their names--power walked over, trying not to stumble on her heels.

"It's okay Mrs. Aldy, I've got him under control!"

"YOU LITTLE TWERP!" Flowey tried to bite Frisk's finger, but she switched hands and his teeth snapped shut on empty air.

"I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure I just heard him issue a death threat."

"Ah, no, he doesn't mean it!" Frisk whined desperately, but the look on Mrs. Aldy's face very clearly spelled out for all of them that she didn't believe her in the slightest.

Strike one.

 _A/N Sorry for the wait! I'm, uh, kind of a slacker. But at least this chapter's longer? I think? Anyways, let me know if you're liking it so far, if I'm doing a good job with the characters, et cetera. Toodles, thanks for reading!_


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